Tuesday, January 19, 2010

The Nightly Dance

‘Josie, it’s none of your business!’

‘Yes, it is. I have to live with you!’

‘No, you don’t! You can go live with Cassie. That’d be great!’

‘I don’t want to live with Cassie.’

‘Yeah, that’s because her mother would never let you, anyway.’

‘Yes, she would!’

‘No way! You’re such a brat; no one wants to live with you.’

‘Well, at least I don’t stink!’

‘You do, too! You smell like a pig!’

‘You should talk! You are the smelliest kid on the bus!’

‘Well, at least I don’t act like an idiot every time a boy gets on the bus!’

‘Yeah. Right. You act like an idiot every time anyone gets on the bus.’

‘Just shut up.’

You shut up!’

‘No, you!’

‘No, you!’

‘No, you!’

I pushed myself away from the doorjamb where I had been leaning, arms folded across my chest as I listened to this clever conversation. The sound of their raised, irritated voices had pulled me downstairs from my bedroom office on the second floor.

‘Here’s an idea, guys! Why don’t you both be quiet!’

But Josie, completely unintimidated by my presence and my suggestion, had to get the last word in.

‘No, you!’

‘Josie! I said, be quiet!’ I could see the wheels turning in that lovely head. I could see the split second the cogs meshed and she decided it wasn’t worth the risk to utter one final ‘No, you!’ Wise choice.

‘Well, tell Eli to quit telling me to shut up!’

I cocked my head to one side.

‘I believe I just heard you telling him the same thing!’

‘Yeah, Josie!’

‘You!’ I swung to face my thirteen year old. ‘You be quiet!’

‘She started it!’

‘Nuh-uh! He threw the remote at me!’

‘Yeah, after you moved it out of the chair, where I was sitting!’

‘Guys! BE QUIET!!’

‘You got out of it, Eli! You snooze, you lose!’

‘Josie! Enough!’

‘Mum! I was watching Stargate SG-1 and I got up to go to the bathroom, and Josie took my chair!’

‘You’ve been watching TV for two hours! It’s my turn to pick a show!’

‘After this show is over! You can’t just change it in the middle of a show, and you can’t take my chair just because I go to the bathroom!’

‘Well, I can’t see it from the couch!’

‘You don’t like Stargate, anyway! You don’t need to see it!’

‘I need to see MY show!’

‘You shouldn’t even be WATCHING your show!’

‘You’ve hogged the TV all day! First you played X-Box, and then you watched your stupid shows!’

Your show is the stupid one!’

‘No, yours is!’

‘No, yours is!’



  1. Is'nt parenthood grand ! Hey the cat seams relaxed! ya know what i could tell you it gets better but .... it doesnt lol no way wait untill they start driving. Then they movew out on thrir own ......... nope still dad I need 500 bucks cars broke down . or I need the rent money or........ well you get where this is going ... In the word of Evelyn Harper: God gave us children so death wont be such a disapointment!

  2. Now THERE'S a quote!

    Hi Wally! Believe me, I know what you're talking about. My oldest son is almost 27, so I've done the driving bit, survived the moving out, the lending of money, yadayada. The good thing is that now, when he borrows, Guy always pays it back!

    They drive me absolutely nuts, but I wouldn't trade them for the world!

    However, there are days when I really look forward to experiencing 'Empty Nest Syndrome'!

  3. And they wounder why we have gray hair!

  4. Shhhhh!

    Whaddaya mean, gray??? I've been telling people for YEARS that those are sun-bleached streaks I've got!

    Quit it, right now!!! Your wife needs to give you a good talking to!

    P.S. Thank you for spelling 'gray' properly. I correspond with many Brits and Aussies and it's nice to see a good old American 'gray'! (Where did they learn to spell, anyway?)

    Sheesh. Gray hair. I never...

  5. OH you poor thing ! They have made you loose your mind .I know its been a long time but.... You should know having my wife talk to me may have a short term affect on me, but will really not do a thing for me.

  6. You mean, you aren't scared of your wife???

    Sheesh... don't tell Mr. Grumbles. He thinks every man is terrified of his mate!


    Thanks for being a 'follower', btw! xx

  7. Oh I didnt say i wasnt scared of my wife , I AM terrified of her , I just said it wouldn't do any good.

  8. Hello! I am Jo-Anna- Wally's Daughter. Yes, we children can be a pain in the butt sometimes. I do remember that parents can be ones at times as well... but for good reason. "Where are you going? What time will you be back?" I don't think I had it so hard. I knew where the line was, and for the most part I stayed there. (Even though I remember a few words we had from time to time) As for my brother, well, that was another story. Now that I have one of my own, not yet in teen years, I hope I can do as good of a job that my father did in teaching me right from wrong and to care for other people. I will be looking for the grays in a few years... then again I might have some hiding in there somewhere. I welcome all the grays to come.

  9. Hello, Jo-Anna!

    What a lovely comment, and how nice to hear from you. I never had any doubts Wally would raise a delightful young lady. (He was a wicked sweetheart, growing up!)

    Your perspective changes when you become a parent, doesn't it? I always thought I must have been the most delightful child to raise. But now that Josie is fourteen, and has a bit of an attitude... well. Every once in awhile something comes out of her mouth and I think, 'Wow. I remember saying that to MY mother!' So I guess maybe I wasn't quite as delightful as I thought!

    We do the best we can, and have to learn to pick our battles, and respect that our children need to test their boundaries once in a while as they develop and learn how to make their own responsible decisions. Gotta give in sometimes, just so they gain confidence and a feeling of power. The world can be a tough place, and they need to feel a healthy bit of self-esteem to properly deal with life.

    But the constant bickering between those two drives me bonkers!!! And yet, every single night they holler back and forth from their rooms...'Night Eli. I love you!' 'Love you too, Jos.'

    Nothing in the world sounds better than that, and it's the perfect way to end a day!

    Please come back and visit again, sweetie.

    P.S. Your dad has a really neat book he might share with you... tell him I said so. I hear he's scared of us bossy women!

  10. It's a deja vu thing....the kids grow up and leave and you think phew..no more sniping and then they come back with their own new tribe of ankle biters and history starts to repeat itself...it's like grownd hog day all over again...

    'grandpas taking me to Africa'
    'no he's not'
    'yes he is'
    'no he's not because he's taking me'
    'no he's not, he's taking me'
    'why would he take you. you're not nice'
    'yes I am, you're aweful and grandpa likes me best so he's taking me to Africa next'
    'no he's not'
    'yes he is'

  11. Oooh, I HATED that movie! (But I LOVE Yogi Berra!)

    And what do you do when it's your grand-ankle-biters who are sniping? Ignore them? Discipline them? Holler for their parents to come break it up?

    I'll need some advice on that, eventually. Not that I'm old enough to be a grandmother, or anything...

    What should I be called, when I am? Nana? Grammy? Gran? I rather like the sound of 'Grumpy'...

    No, I don't.
    Yes, I do.
    I'm so stupid!
    No, I am.
    No! I am!!!

  12. They all know about grandpa's dog walloping stick...one mention of it and dead silence followed by giggles then

    'Grandpa's got a dog walloping stick'
    'no he hasn't'
    'yes he has and he's going to whack you with it'
    'no he's not'
    'yes he is and then he's taking me to Africa'
    'no he's not'

    and on it goes

    KK gets 'bubu' for grandma. It's PNG pidgeon.

  13. Bubu, hmmm? Funny... are you familiar with the American cartoon, Yogi Bear? And his side-kick, Bubu? I just think that's a heck of a coincidence, talking about Yogi Berra and Bubu...

    Yes, I am easily amused.

    Oh, I am not!
    Yes, I am, too!
    Am not!
    An too!

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  15. yep know Yogi bear and bubu. have previously run it past kk but was threatened with my own DWS so don't mention the bear and it's cub any more
    it's safer that way.

  16. Now, Trev! That's just a tease! Leaving a comment and then deleting it! Hehehe. Must have been another Trev masterpiece!

    Good morning, Ali g. I'll take the hint and not mention Yogi Bear and Bubu, either, okay? I'm a fast learner!

    BTW... the kids weren't home from school THREE MINUTES yesterday when they were fighting over that TV!!! AGAIN!!! So... no television for the third night in a row. They obviously haven't developed the skill of learning fast, like their mother has!!!