A Lobbyist, a Senator and a Representative... A New Contest on GAG

It’s time for a contest on GAG. It’s been far too long since I had some fun on Grumbles and Grins, and I figured I’d better do something now, while it’s First Quarter moon. Because… you all know how I get when the moon is full!

Grrr!!!

Recently, I was telling a friend about some of the events, meetings and activities written into my schedule for the next few days. I wrote, “I have a meeting with a lobbyist, a senator and a representative in a coffee shop…”

Of course, I immediately thought, “Boy, that sounds like the intro to a joke!”

“A lobbyist, a senator and a representative walked into a coffee shop…”

“A lobbyist, a senator and a representative walked into a bar…”

“A lobbyist, a senator and a representative walked into a…”

So, here is my challenge. Come up with a joke for one of those introductory sentences and submit them in the comments section of this posting. The winner will receive a copy of the new cookbook just put out by the Lexington-Highland Historical Society, and a copy of the DVD produced by Tom Olds and me, which contains photos of the beautiful state of Maine, set to music. (By the way… the photo on the label shows Hutchins Hill in the background, and although you can’t see it, my house is nestled in those woods half-way up the hill.)

The contest will run until February 27th, and I will decide the winner, this time. No drawings, no ‘eeny-meeny-miney-moes’. I’ll simply choose the one I like the best, or the one that made me smile the longest, or groan the loudest. Enter as many times as you want—the more, the merrier.

And if you’re not ‘into’ cooking, just remember—someone you know and love, IS! This book will make a great gift, and you are supporting the efforts of the folks in two tiny, rural communities who are trying to preserve the history of this region in the western mountains of Maine.

Okay! “A lobbyist, a senator and a representative walked into a….”


Give it your best shot! And thanks for playing with me on GAG.

Kaz
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Bottom (fuzzy) photo was taken in the Tavern at the Harraseeket Inn in Freeport, Maine-- where I actually DID meet with a lobbyist (er...Governmental Affairs Consultant) on Friday night.

Whoopie Pies and Whoopie Cushions

There was a news article on the front page of the Maine section of today’s Bangor Daily News which caught my eye. “Lawmakers Debate Whoopie Pie as State Dessert”.

Incredulity caused me to read the article from beginning to end. It was just yesterday, while speaking to two of our state representatives, that I first heard of this bill… and the fact that upwards of one million dollars might be spent on promoting it and debating it before a final vote is taken in the Legislature.

One million dollars. For whoopie pies.

Here’s the deal. Apparently, some Mainers feel the need to have an official ‘state’ dessert. Why? I asked myself. Well, that question was promptly answered—by a University of Maine executive, no less.

““It builds pride in our state, it capitalizes on our unique and wonderful foodstuffs,” University of Maine Foundation President Amos Orcutt told the State and Local Government Committee”.

Okay. But are whoopie pies unique to Maine? Here is another quote from that article.

“Whoopie pies should be declared Maine’s official state dessert before Pennsylvania tries to snap up credit for the tasty chocolate cakes oozing with creamy white frosting, a legislative committee was told Monday.

"The bill’s sponsor, Rep. Paul Davis, R-Sangerville, warned that residents of the Keystone State may try to make a move if Maine lawmakers are unwilling to act. The hearing featured fresh whoopie pies, someone wearing a whoopie costume, and even a song praising the product as “a slice of happiness.””

I’m all for promoting the whoopie pie industry here in Maine—now that I know one exists. And I’ve always been open to the notion of inserting a little fun and ‘theater’ into a debate. But I’ve got to say this. To burn up expensive resources (our tax dollars pay the Legislators’ salaries, mileage, and other expenses) to debate a topic like a ‘state dessert’ seems to me to be a misuse of time and funds. This state is in economic shambles. This state is confronting weighty issues which must be dealt with immediately; such as medical insurance and health care, a welfare system which is out of control, and a corporate wind lobby with a terribly expensive agenda to push while we citizens are expecting our representatives in Augusta to study the facts of the issue, and then—push back.

I won’t find fault with the citizen who wrote this bill—after all, this is supposed to be a citizens’ government, and we can devise bill proposals of any type we choose. I won’t even criticize Representative Davis, who sponsored it; no doubt, at the request of one of his constituents. But what I will do is make a few requests of my own.

I ask that the Bangor Daily News and its sister papers-- the Portland Press Herald, the Kennebec Journal and the Maine Sunday Telegram-- devote some of their front page space and a few fact-hungry reporters to the debate revolving around the former governor’s wind energy plan for Maine before the session draws to a close. This topic is immediate and critical to our state’s future. Whoopie pies, however? Not so much.

I request that our Representatives and Senators make a point to become at least as involved in the wind energy debate as they are about the question of whether or not they can trounce Pennsylvania in a race to claim the whoopie pie. (The act of putting this topic into words is a bit embarrassing, I am finding. Somewhat similar to the emotion I’ve experienced when inadvertently sitting on a whoopie cushion, I suppose. I wonder if the two ‘whoopies’ are related?)

And third: Those hundreds-- even thousands-- of us who have been devoting vast amounts of time, money and resources to educating the public about the facts regarding industrial wind would be very encouraged if citizens would take a few moments out of their busy days to ponder the implications of one of the most socially, financially and environmentally damaging energy plans to confront us in decades. We all love those dual chocolate cakes sandwiching creamy vanilla icing—there’s no doubt about it. But let’s all put this into perspective. There are vital, time-critical issues facing this state.

Please get down to business. Make whoopie, if you must. And then get back to the business of making ‘Maine—the way life SHOULD be’.

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Whoopie Pie--Kevin Bennett photo, Bangor Daily News